How To Control Ourselves
Expectation
When people are busy, they complain there are too many things to do and want to have a chill.
When people are free, they complain there is nothing to do and feel bored.
Expectation is very typical advocate of this fictitious human-made problem.
Each person has their own comfort zone which is the environment that they feel the most comfortable, typically their home and workplace. When people are out of this zone, they feel uncomfortable, sometimes lose their control, get panicked and say "This is not what I expected."
This is very unwise phrase to use. The world is not prepared for each of us like Final Fantasy. So basically our expectation is not meant to be correct 100% as a Chinese proverb said, "Only the foolish worries the future".
Connect To Ourselves
Humans certainly need to have sometime to make self-reflection and there are many ways to do it.
Breathing Meditation Procedure
When people are busy, they complain there are too many things to do and want to have a chill.
When people are free, they complain there is nothing to do and feel bored.
Expectation is very typical advocate of this fictitious human-made problem.
Each person has their own comfort zone which is the environment that they feel the most comfortable, typically their home and workplace. When people are out of this zone, they feel uncomfortable, sometimes lose their control, get panicked and say "This is not what I expected."
This is very unwise phrase to use. The world is not prepared for each of us like Final Fantasy. So basically our expectation is not meant to be correct 100% as a Chinese proverb said, "Only the foolish worries the future".
Connect To Ourselves
Humans certainly need to have sometime to make self-reflection and there are many ways to do it.
Breathing Meditation Procedure
- choose the most comfortable place, chair, floor and posture
- Close your eyes and release your body from all tension
- Breathe deeply in, and breathe out deeply. You do not have to make sounds while you are doing this. Let your lung filled up with air naturally.
- Repeat this process 10 minutes whenever in a day. It is important to constantly do this meditation as a reflection of your mind.
Take Time Doing Nothing
- If you feel uncomfortable, irritated and frustrated when you are just sitting down still, it means you are lacking balance between calmness of life and business of life because you feel stress by "doing nothing"
10 Things We Can Do to Contribute to Internal, Interpersonal, and Organizational Peace (from Center for Nonviolent Communication)
(1) Spend some time each day quietly reflecting on how we would like to relate to ourselves and others.(2) Remember that all human beings have the same needs.
(3) Check our intention to see if we are as interested in others getting their needs met as our own.
(4) When asking someone to do something, check first to see if we are making a request or a demand.
(5) Instead of saying what we DON'T want someone to do, say what we DO want the person to do.
(6) Instead of saying what we want someone to BE, say what action we'd like the person to take that we hope will help the person be that way.
(7) Before agreeing or disagreeing with anyone's opinions, try to tune in to what the person is feeling and needing.
(8) Instead of saying "No," say what need of ours prevents us from saying "Yes."
(9) If we are feeling upset, think about what need of ours is not being met, and what we could do to meet it, instead of thinking about what's wrong with others or ourselves.
(10) Instead of praising someone who did something we like, express our gratitude by telling the person what need of ours that action met.
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